Ten Ways To Earn My Heart

Hey guys!!!  Happy New week!!  How was the weekend? And happy Muslim Holiday to my Muslim readers, even though it’s not from my heart. Why?  No, I don’t have any problem with Islam, but why today?  I was supposed to have my first lecture today!!!  After almost five months of almost going crazy stuck indoors.  But I do hope this holiday is that one that Muslims give people plenty meat, hence my side eye in the picture above. Am looking at my Muslim neighbors wondering ‘What are they waiting for?’. Anyways, while am stuck here in my baggiest sweatpants and loose shirt, I decided to write a post that I have had forever in my draft. 

So when I did the TMI tag (please, if you missed it check it out- here) I mentioned my turn offs and turn ons. But I feel like maybe I should talk about the easiest way into my heart. Because yes, i am single. And to someone like me, it is very odd. Seeing how ever since I started dating I haven’t been single for more than a week. Am not a player, trust me I have no game, but am just lucky like that. *Cool Shades*

So here are Ten ways to get into my heart/ My new dating checklist.

1) You need to be a nerd. I don’t care how cute you are, I don’t care how much money you think you have but if you aren’t a nerd, you are nothing to me. I mean, have you seen me?  I am such a nerd, I watch cartoons like they give me life and if we can’t watch cartoons together, just forget it. We need to be able to quarrel over DC and Marvel, over Batman and Iron-man. Even though, we all know Batman is everything.

2) You need to be one of those people who give crazily adorable nicknames. Things like ‘Sweet Potato’ ‘My Cute Cuddly Cushion’ ‘Teddy Wubby’ etc. 

3) Beyonce. We all know Beyonce is Bae. She is the Queen, and I don’t need to waste my energy arguing over this. Once,  I met a guy who said Shakira is better than Beyonce. 

If not that, I made a promise to myself that ‘Violence is Never the answer otherwise’.

4) I adore those very cute couples on TV.  You know those ones that do things like this-

Me- Let’s go get Ice-Cream

My Partner- I’m picking the flavor 

Me- Yes, and you’ll choose Double Vanilla.

My Partner- (Looks at me and sigh)  Yes, i’ll choose Double Vanilla.

You know, those couples that until one see the other they are uncomfortable. When I enter the room,  I can’t rest till my eyes find you. Yes, i am overly romantic and attached while in a relationship.

5) You need to understand, I don’t dig the whole boyfriend-girlfriend gig. Which is why,  I always use ‘Partner’ instead. 

6) You need to not be a Trumper. Enough said, even if you are everything else on this list and you support Trump. I’ll just start walking away,  cause there ain’t any point in us talking. 

7) We need to love E! E! means Everything! to me. I live mostly for E! So, we need to agree that E! rocks. 

8) You need to be physical. Am not talking about sex here.  I mean, am this guy who loves cuddling so much. And I just love resting my head on someone or someone resting there’s on mine. I just really love touching or being touched. Enough said. 

9) You watch Glee. And your favorite characters are Kurt, Santana, Mercedes, Blaine and Rachel. 

10) You need to be crazy. Have you met me?  I am the craziest guy this side of the galaxy, and if you aren’t crazy,  darling, why are we talking?

Bonus- You need to be a good talker. Most people think I’m quiet, but if you know me I love conversations. Especially, good conversations. Those types that we can have over a cup of coffee, with Netflix or YouTube and alot of Spaghetti.

So there it is, if you know anyone who fits the bill, don’t forget to hit me up. Cause, yes I am single and though am not really searching i’ld love to connect with anyone -guy or girl,  who fits the bill, just for friendship. 

P. S- Don’t forget to follow me on Instagram.

And check out these other posts-

My Christmas Wish

My Weekend Life 

What I Wore. 

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17 thoughts on “Ten Ways To Earn My Heart

  1. Lol I’ve got this amused grin on my face right now. You actually compiled all this? Someone must really want to get out of the single life. I don’t understand people that don’t watch E! at all. It’s like taking a peek into rich people’s lives. Same goes for people who support Trump. 🙍

    Like

    1. Exactly!!! The point of E! Is to see all the things you wanna buy and houses you wanna live in, but can’t yet… There is no excuse for Trump my dear, None at all…. Not really, though, would be fun to start dating again but am Kay being single

      Like

  2. 😂😂 this was a delightful post. You sound like a really interesting person. And your looks don’t hurt none either.
    Okay first of all, Batman is rather overrated. Fight me.
    Take away his suit and gadgets and you have another eccentric billionaire playboy type. He’s a fully grown man who runs around with bat ears for crying out loud. But mad props to your nerdism.
    2. How does “infantile person” and “refined bee excreta” sound?
    3. Yes. No contest.
    4. Those couples make me laugh. Just ha.
    5. I try to avoid all labels if possible. It’s less stress.
    6. Ew. No.
    7. Gosh, ever since Fashion Police ended I just don’t feel E! anymore
    8. Eh
    9. Yaaas, Klaine and Brantana for the win.
    10. The best people in life are crazy.
    So like I said you seem cool and all and if it’s friendship you’re looking for, I’m available.
    If you’re interested in a relationship, I know someone who might fit your bill. Y’all have so much in common from what I can tell.

    Like

    1. OMG, you don’t know how much I am laughing right now… Hahhahaah, batman overrated nuh uh…. I obviously and eternally disagree, I think you are defining Iron Man, Batman has some man pain and killer lurking skills yo!!! Fashion Police really made me cry!!!!! HEY!!! you read fanfic… My favorite fanfic sites are archiveofourown and Fanfic.net and sometimes watt pad, hbu? And you also speak our lingo and arent phobic tooo. …hahaha, i’ld love to connect with you, if you don’t mind? Instagram? Honestly, your comment is one of the funniest and the best I have gotten on my blog…. ☺

      Liked by 1 person

      1. The only thing mad about Batman is the fact that he thinks he’s some sort of dark knight avenger. I’m so sure the people of Gotham just humor him because he’s rich.
        At least he’s better than Superman. Like yeah glasses and a curl in your hair, what a disguise! You must be a master of stealth. 😒 idiot.
        I love Archiveofourown! That’s basically the only fanfic site I use because it’s really easy to navigate. What fandoms are you in? Do you have an OTP? Lol, I am far from phobic.
        Instagram, yes! @jemima_abu
        Why, thank you.

        Like

      2. Clark’s disguise is annoying, I mean, I wear glasses and I used to have a really awesome Afro – if I do say so myself, but I have cut the Afro and I don’t always wear my glasses, and yet people whom have only seen me with the Afro and with glasses on for Just a couple secs are like ‘Ah ah Desmond what happened, you cut your hair? ‘ and you tell me a curl, some terrible clothes and some glasses really disguised you? Please, Spare me the Hannah Montana, OTP,, like in My TMI tag Post, Klaine for sure, and several other weird ones lols..

        Liked by 1 person

  3. Very candid post. Me ehn, I’ve given up on writing lists. They grow longer each day considering none of the wishes are actually met 😞😞😞. I wish you luck though! With the current economic situation, you’ll need it 😂😂😂😂. *runs out*

    Liked by 1 person

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